March Monster Madness: The Fatal Final Four

The Lists Ethan Lewis Marc Buxton Mike Cecchini 3/28/2013 at 12:08AM

It's our own very special breed of March Madness and we're down to the Final Four! It's Godzilla vs. Gamera for scaly green kaiju supremacy, and Mothra vs. King Ghidorah for the winner of the winged kaiju!

Round THREE of March Monster Madness brings us to The Fatal Final Four! Godzilla vs. Gamera and King Ghidorah vs. Mothra! While it's clear that polls such as these often boil down to being mere popularity contests, I beg you, the most discerning and intelligent readers of giant monster nonsense on the entire internet, to please apply your considerable critical thinking skills to these final two matches. Don't just vote for the most popular monster...consider who you genuinely think deserves to win! The consequences for voting in a manner inconsistent with the method outlined above are dire. Hell hath no fury like a kaiju scorned, my friends. You don't want any of these babies knocking on your door asking questions. Now, it's time to point, scream, and run! And this time, we've got a multi-media fiesta of destruction to convince you who's who and what's what!

UPDATED! THE POLLS HAVE CLOSED AND THE WINNERS ARE ANNOUNCED BELOW! CHECK OUT WHO ADVANCES TO THE FINALS!!!

MOTHRA

"The boys wanna be her, the girls wanna be her" - Peaches

Mothra is probably the most popular monster of the Toho universe. I might dare even say that she is more popular than Godzilla.

There is something about her that people gravitate to. While Godzilla is a more of a neutral force of nature, Mothra is good. She is on the side of good and righteous. She stands up against evil, and she’s tough as steel. Mothra flies into battle when many others refuse. She has a pure heart, and yeah, she’s kinda cute at the same time. Even people who aren’t into the Toho films generally like this big giant fluffy moth. But the best part is that she isn’t defined by Godzilla. In fact, Mothra has at least three films where she is the star. That's very rare for a Toho monster. She’s inspired music, a Pokemon, and an entire generation of Godzilla lovers.

So should she win the vote? I think that if Mothra could speak, it wouldn’t much matter to her. She will continue to kick ass and take names and look great doing it. But should you vote for her? Hell yes. How many times does a goddess have to save the planet before you thank her? King Ghidorah doesn't stand a chance!

VS.

KING GHIDORAH

It’s said a monster is defined by its enemies (no one actually ever said that, but it sounds really good), if this is true than there is none mightier than King Ghidorah. Ghidorah has continently been Godzilla’s most enduring foe, and has always taken the iconic lizard to the limit. In the film Destroy All Monsters, Ghidorah goes toe-to toe with TEN kaiju. Count them! Ten! Four of which had starred in their own films! (special Den of Geek Respect Points for anyone who can name all four), and Ghidorah ALMOST wins! Ghidorah is Godzila’s Joker, his Moriarity, his Lex Luthor. Imgine, a Moriarty with three heads. Yikes!

What kind of foes does Mothra have? Candles? A bug-zapper? Plus, Ghidorah is an alien, not some simple mutated earth creature. Who knows what kind of adventures and battles Ghidorah has had even before he came to Earth?!? So, put your vote where it counts. In the lightning wielding, wheeling dealing, kaiju-smackin', crackalackin',  three-headed horror that can’t go farther! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

WINNER: MOTHRA!

Talk about an upset, and talk about a battle! In one of the closest polls of the entire tournament, Mothra squeaked out a victory over King Ghidorah by flying off with only 53% of the vote. Still, it's enough to put the winged one in the finals of the inaugural March Monster Madness!

GAMERA
I never thought when we began this tournament that Gamera would be in the Elite Eight...or the Final Four. We included him almost as a joke. But we were wrong. You guys LOVE Gamera. Something about this giant flying turtle has captivated the hearts and minds of our favorite geeks. Gamera is truly our Cinderella story of March Monster Madness. He fights space aliens, other evil monsters, and he is the defender of children. Godzilla is more neutral than “good.” But Gamera? Nah. He’s pretty damn good. Sure, he might be easy to make fun of. And he does have a pretty epic theme song (and a remake by MST3K), but we never expected you guys would love him thismuch!

Will he beat Godzilla? Only you can decide that! But what do I think? I think it would be one of the most incredible upsets in history! It'd be a huge victory for the underdog (or under turtle in this case). So if YOU wants to see Gamera in the Final Round you have to vote. Tell your friends to vote. Tell your mom to vote. Vote from your laptop, your iPad, your work computer, and your phone. Gamera 2013!

VS.

GODZILLA

Before you think about not voting for Godzilla, think of this, there is not tournament without him. He's the 1927 Yankees, the nineties Bulls, the seventies Oakland Athletics, Tiger Woods, Muhammad Ali, and a thermonuclear bomb all rolled into one. He is a walking cautionary tale of meddling with primordial forces. He is a living embodiment of mankind’s fears of nuclear armageddon.

If this was a tournament of the world’s greatest super spy, James Bond would win. Godzilla is Bond. Mothra and Gamera both have a series of awesome films, but if you add all their films together and multiply by two you still wouldn’t have as many awesome monster smackdowns that starred Godzilla. Did Mothra star in a film with the dude that played Perry Mason, no he did not. Was New York Yankee outfielder Hideki Matsui nicknamed Mothra? No he was not.

Godzilla has fought and beat them all. He was so unstoppable, that Japan had to import King Kong to Asia from America, and Godzilla still did not lose. Godzilla still manages to look badass even when he is hanging with that smoke-ring breathing, Pillsbury looking son of his. Godzilla defines a genre, he defines a modern fear of ragin destruction, and he breathes fire. Lots and lots of fire. Mothra is awesome, Mothra is everything good about this world, Godzilla is beyond all that.

Godzilla just is, and deserves your vote.

WINNER: GAMERA!!!

Another close call, and, if you can believe it...an even BIGGER upset! Who would have thought that Godzilla, the King of the Monsters himself, could possibly be defeated by...a flying turtle? But here we are! GAMERA has triumphed over Godzilla, in what may very well be THE biggest cinderella story of March Madness...including, y'know, the one that has to do with bouncing an orange ball all over the place. So yeah, let this sink in for a moment: 54% of you voted for Gamera instead of Godzilla. 54% of you, it would seem, actually have sould and root for the underdog. On to the finals for Gamera! (hey, I refrained from singing the song this time! Just go watch the video!)

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